Resolved: Live Fearlessly

Recently I had dinner with my niece while she was in southern California on a business trip.  Toward the end of our dinner we discussed how “self-talk” can often be negative and what an obstacle it is to overcome.  She went on to tell me about her 2011 New Year’s resolution, “No Fear in 2011.” 

Amanda had been thinking about learning to wakeboard for a long time.  In the summers prior to her 2011 resolution she had always allowed her inner voice to convince her not to do it.  Given the bindings on wakeboards, she had questioned what would happen to her ankles and knees when she fell.  There were hundreds of other “what ifs” as well.  She let her fear keep her from trying something that she saw others enjoying.  Equipped with her 2011 resolution, she not only tried wakeboarding but she discovered a new sport that she loves. That success motivated her to conquer her fears in other areas of her life too. 

It occurred it me that other women in my life have been serving as real-life, inspiring role models for overcoming fear this last year.  A support professional that is a member of one of Business Women Rising’s Leadership Vistas chapters was approached about being a member of a task force responsible for selecting and implementing a new operational system.  Her initial reaction was to decline.  Her “self-talk” raised all sorts of negatives for her to consider; extra work without extra compensation; sharing responsibilities with prickly peers from other departments; and, exposure to blame if the selection and implementation of the new system did not go well.  She talked about this issue with her fellow Leadership Vista members and asked for their insights.  After the group discussion and hearing the diverse and knowledgeable suggestions, she overcame her fear and “self-talk” and accepted the opportunity to serve on the task force.  As a result she has enriched her own professional knowledge, gained valuable experience that will benefit not only her current company but will enhance her resume, has been exposed to senior management across her company and to outside service providers by demonstrating her willingness and ability to successfully complete special projects.  She found her task force experience to be exhilarating as well as fulfilling and is now open to other such opportunities and the growth and advancement possibilities that follow. 

Armed with these heartening examples of what can happen when you overcome your fears I have decided that my 2012 New Year’s resolution is to live fearlessly.  So, I set out to learn how to do just that.  The Google search results to “How to live fearlessly,” were not what I was looking for.  Where are the step-by-step directions to becoming and being fearless? (Julia Child or Betty Crocker could have added a recipe for a Fearless sauce as an accompaniment to fried liver or haggis.)   Then I tried searching, what may be the opposite of fear, courage.  That didn’t turn up any specific directions either.  What I did find that finally hit home for me was the following quote by Parmahansa Yogananda, “…destroy fear, which paralyzes all efforts to succeed and attracts the very thing you fear.”  (Not exactly an easy- to- bake recipe.)  It dismayed me that by being fearful of something I was attracting it.   Maybe an example would make my last statement a little clearer. 

I am afraid of failing.  I am afraid of doing.  I come up with big ideas but put forth no effort to accomplish them because I am afraid of what will happen if I do not succeed.   Some of my more sane fears are that I won’t do whatever “it” is correctly (there’s that recipe concept again), it will be too hard for me, I don’t have all the information or knowledge needed, others will make fun of me or think my idea is foolish, I won’t be respected, I’ll ruin myself financially and won’t be able to recover.  So by being afraid to fail that’s what I do.  Not because I can’t put my ideas into action and succeed but because I don’t even try.  All my fears can either be avoided by planning for or really don’t matter much.   It just takes one reason to take a risk and try.  I might not get to where I thought I was going but the journey will be as, if not more, worthwhile and beneficial.  It may even lead to someone or something I would not have discovered if I do not try to be fearless. 

So without a recipe or specific directions I’m going to find, and keeping finding, one reason to live fearlessly in 2012.  Please be fearless and join me!